Move to Cymru, Jezza,
you’ll find a welcome here
(and not just in the hillside)!
Don’t buy a second home
and stop talking about Britain….
join our national liberation.
Despite our ‘cig’ this and ‘cig’ that
we’ve plenty of veggies and vegans,
you’ll savour our Glamorgan Sausages.
There’ll be no macho northern folk
condemning you as ‘a wimp’;
many of our finest poets were pacifists.
( I know, as you admit, you aren’t
strictly one as well, but anti-imperialist;
we are a colony, you’ll appreciate that.)
You don’t have to be a bard
but try a limerick about Jeremy Hunt,
it’ll be easy to find a rhyme.
Move to Cymru, our new Keir Hardie,
with only the ‘Western Mail’ on attack
and who reads that anyway?
Most of us are against air strikes here;
you can come along to the football
and cheerfully boo the royalist anthem.
You’ll feel at home everywhere
except, maybe, in the Vale….
mind , Charlotte Church could be your neighbour.
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